Since adoption is something that I have wanted SO badly for so many years, you would think I would be whipping out paperwork and checking off boxes like a Type A Superstar. Seriously, what is my problem?!
I could blame the 'system' for taking so long between steps. I could even leave it as chronic procrastination, but I know it's more than that. It's fear. I'm terrified about a whole laundry list of what-if's. I know so much about adoption and the good, bad, and the ugly, and I'm terrified that we will only experience the bad and the ugly and none of the good.
It gets harder and harder to hold on to our resolve to 'get our hands dirty' when you start to see the mud puddles. Intellectually, I believe that we are not in this world to have everything easy and that eternity will be worth any pain, suffering, rejection, and grief that we experience in this life. But signing up for all that FOR REAL is just plain scary.
" For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of power and love and discipline."
2 Timothy 1:7
New American Standard Bible (NASB)
So today, I am going to look to Him for the power, love, and discipline for each new task on the adoption process timeline and pray for the wisdom to do the same each day for all my days. To God alone be the Glory.
(Be sure to check for updates to our timeline HERE)